Archives For family

Mothers, continuity, and the immutability of God

May 12, 2013 — 13 Comments
My entire family at Mom and Dad's 50th wedding anniversary last summer

My entire family at Mom and Dad’s 50th wedding anniversary last summer

This morning, I work up, got on my motorcycle and drove to McDonald’s for a McMuffin. This is actually what I do EVERY Sunday, at least the ones in which I am in town. I come here (I’m currently typing this in the corner of McDonald’s while beyond cheesy Chinese pop music plays in the background), read the Bible, journal some, catch up on the week’s news (mainly on ESPN.com), pray, blog, and generally just decompress. It really is one of the highlights of each week.

Continuity is a wonderful thing. For me while living in a country which is growing and changing at a breakneck speed, in a working environment where the people around me are constantly shifting, this little bit of continuity of Sundays being “me and God time” has kept me afloat.

It has looked different over the past ten years, as I have shifted cities and work situations several times. At times it has been open park benches and at others it has been tea houses. Since December here, it has been McDonald’s. However, every Sunday I try to get away and just do something similar to what I have just outlined.

As I think more about this subject of continuity, I see it all over the place.

In life, we all value continuity in relationships. Often times, we most value those friendships we have had the longest. Part of the innate value in these relationships is that they have weathered the natural ups and downs of life with you. They have seen you at your best and worst, and yet they continue on in friendship.

In marriage, people always aspire to “until death do us part”.

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In Pilgrimage ,
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Epic birthday surprise

April 29, 2013 — 20 Comments
Mom and Dad during this epic birthday surprise.

Mom and Dad during this epic birthday surprise.

I’ve never been good at surprises. The excitement of whatever is to come is almost always too big of a burden for me to bear. I don’t like this about myself, but it’s true. I do love surprises, though. I’m just not very good at them. This fact is what makes this story that much more enjoyable to remember.

It was March 2011. I was having a local visa issue, so I needed to leave the country for a week or so in order to work it out. This had to be done by the first week in May or I would be in trouble with the local authorities.

I could do this in Hong Kong and this is what I planned. However, after doing some quick math I soon realized I could do the same trip to America for just a little higher cost. The thought occurred that I could actually use the time to surprise my parents for their birthdays.

My parents were born exactly three years and one day apart from each other. April 29 and 30 are their birthdays, so it is always nice to have them so close together.

After coming up with a grand plan with my sisters, Betsy and Becky, it was on!

I arrived in Atlanta on April 28, 2011 and secretly crashed with Becky and the Bracher clan for the evening. Mom and Dad literally track my flights on the internet whenever I am going back to America, so it was strange to be in America and they not know about it.

Betsy and Becky set the entire weekend up. One of Mom’s favorite places in Atlanta is the Swan Coach House. Though I had driven past this famed tea room a million times, I had never actually been there. I once took a former girlfriend there thinking it would be fun. As soon as we walked through the door and I saw the decorum and clientele, I immediately panicked. It was raging with estrogen and southern genteelness. In a word, I was terrified. She graciously stepped in and suggested we go elsewhere. I was relieved. We left without ever being seated.

Betsy, Becky, and I met at the Swan Coach House at 11:30am to get things lined up. We let the hostess know of the gravity of the situation. We told of Mom’s birthday and how I had flown in from Asia to surprise her. The hostess then promptly assigned us a semi-concealed table in the corner. Betsy and Becky stayed in the lobby

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In Life
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The legacy of a father’s presence

April 26, 2013 — 15 Comments
(L) One of my favorite pics of Dad and I; (R) Dad and I when I surprised him with a visit for his birthday 2 years ago

(L) One of my favorite pics of Dad & me; (R) Dad & I with a surprise visit for his birthday 2 years ago

One of the first video of tapes of me that exists is this scene . . . it was the front yard of my parent’s house. I was tiny, maybe 3 years old. I wore cowboy boots, shorts, and a baseball cap (I guess I have always been aesthetically challenged). There was a miniature baseball mitt on my left hand.

My shoulders were slumped over and my knees bent, as I crouched waiting for baseballs to be hit my way. My next door neighbor and lifelong friend, Boone Benton (he is six years older than I am), did the hitting. Though I was thrilled with life at that exact moment, there were no smiles. I was the definition of focused intensity, at least for a 3-year old in cowboy boots and shorts.

Cards on the table; most of the balls went around my glove and through my legs, but I clearly loved it nonetheless. I would chase the ball down from behind me and throw it back to Boone with every bit of strength I could muster up. I didn’t mug for the camera. I just went about the business of honing the skills of a middle infielder.

The video is grainy and jumpy, but my memory is not.

Thinking of that video, two things come to mind about my youth. The first is superficial, while the second has impacted my life for the good well beyond my temporal comprehension. Continue Reading…

In Life
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3 great Easter memories (both fun & significant)

March 31, 2013 — 15 Comments
(left) Betsy, Becky, and I with Dad; just prior to THE Easter Bunny incident; (right) Nathan with my camera two years later

(left) Betsy, Becky, and I with Dad; just prior to THE Easter Bunny incident; (right) Nathan with my camera two years later

Thise week, I have enjoyed thinking about the Easter holiday and the significance in my life. In the process, three great memories have come to mind.

First, I remember being young, really young. I was in Glenville, Georgia at my Grandmother’s (Meme) house. I don’t remember how young I was, but I was young enough to still believe in the Easter bunny.

Glenville, Georgia, as you might guess, is a small town. It has produced the Great Kay Gunter and several NFL players. I love Kay (also known as “Mom” to me) and I really like the NFL, so I think the town is pretty cool.

Anyway, Meme had a large field behind her house. My sisters convinced me THE Easter Bunny had been seen jumping around back there. I completely believed them and went out in search of this holiday titian, second only to Santa in importance. To this day, I can picture “THE Easter Bunny” that I really thought I saw.

He was huge (maybe six feet tall), as white as untouched snow, and his ears were tall and pointy. I was CONVINCED I saw him, so much so that to this day I can remember the image I saw of him jumping in the back of the field and disappearing into the trees.

Of course, I didn’t see him. However, it was so real at the time that I can still remember the mirage my mind concocted on that Easter weekend. My sisters were pretty believable in fooling me at the time.

Second, I remember Easter Day 2005. My sister Betsy was pregnant with her 4th. “Big as a house” pregnant is probably a better, more apt

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Life, Asia, friends, and family (pictorial highlights of 2012)

December 30, 2012 — 7 Comments
My time with John Robert's "Flat Wolfie" at a local 1,200 year old city

My time with John Robert’s “Flat Wolfie” at a local 1,200 year old city

It is December 30, 2012.  Time to get contemplative about this past year and think more about what is to be accomplished this coming year. . . or at least that is what “they” tell us.

Well, I’m not going to do exactly that in this post.  However, I am going to look at a few of my favorite personal pictures of the year from four broad categories (life, Asia, friendship, and family) and talk a little about each.

The top picture is me with “Flat Wolfie” in one of the ancient cities that I frequently visit near where I live.  Who is “Flat Wolfie” you ask???  Well, this is Whitefield Academy’s version of the children’s story “Flat Stanley”.  One of the things I have enjoyed over the years has been helping my nieces and nephews DOMINATE in the Continue Reading…

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9 things I have learned from Mom & Dad’s 50 years of marriage

August 5, 2012 — 6 Comments

(This is my final post in my series, “My thoughts on weddings. . . (a series)“.  If you would like to read more of the articles, please CLICK HERE.

Mom Dad Wedding edited

June 24, 1962. . . Mom and Dad

July was the month of celebrating 50 years of marriage for my parents (click here to read about their wedding).  I was thrilled to be able to be in America for some of July to celebrate with them.  This anniversary was one of my primary motivations in doing this series on weddings.  This will be my last post in this series.  I thought it would be a great way end things simply by talking about a few things I have learned through observation from my parents’ marriage of 50 years. There are way more than nine things I have learned from watching my parent’s marriage over the years.  However, as I sit down to write about it, here are the first nine that come to mind. . . 9 things I have learned from watching my parent’s 50 year marriage

  • Laughter is important – If you have never been around my parents together, that really is too bad.  They are fun.  They laugh.  Especially Mom.  She laughs often, freely, and with great volume (CLICK HERE to learn more about Mom and her laugh).  Mom genuinely thinks Dad is the funniest man in the world.  Seriously.  He is really funny.  Other people also laugh at my Dad’s humor, but nothing approaching the level or decibel of my Mom.  With them, I have seen laughter as vital.  Life can be hard.  Laughter is important, if not vital.  If I ever meet someone whom thinks I am half as funny as Mom thinks Dad is, I will marry her then and there.  Well, maybe not that dramatically, but you get my point.
  • Children are a privilege and stewardship – Mom and Dad prioritized their kids above all things.  Mom quit work and poured her energy into us.  Dad halted all personal hobbies and activities while we were still in their home.  Once I went to college, the Continue Reading…
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Alaskan beauty and the image of God

July 5, 2012 — 8 Comments

As I type this, I am sitting in a coffee house here in Skagway, Alaska.  Mom and Dad are treating the entire famliy to a 10 day cruise around Alaska.  It will end in Vancouver.  This is in celebration of their 50th wedding anniversary.

Skagway, AK

This is the view from my current writing spot. . .

Looking out of the window at this old gold rush era town of Skagway, there are snow caps engulfing the two-story building lined streets to my right.  The buildings look like something out of an old western movie you would see on TNT late at night.  To my left, the deep blue waters hold car sized ice-boulders which have chipped off from nearby glaciers.  In a word, this place is astounding.  I’m not much for scenery, but even I have been moved by this rugged, arctic locale.

In the past two days, whales have swum as close as 20 yards from the table from which we were enjoying dinner.  Two otters swam carelessly 50 yards Continue Reading…

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Betsy’s wedding gift and sacrifice

July 2, 2012 — 8 Comments

(This article is in “My thoughts on weddings. . . (a series)” that I did during June and early July.  If you have not read the other posts, I suggest you click here for an overview of the series and past articles.)

John Gunter with sisters at the beach

My wonderful sisters, Becky and Betsy

It was a few months prior to my graduation from college.  Life was crazy, but school was slowing down.  My sister Betsy was getting married in April.  You see, I love both of my sisters as much as is possible for siblings to love each other.  I was, and continue to be, fortunate to have sisters that are also wonderful friends.  To this day, there is nothing I enjoy more than spending time with Betsy and Becky.  Seriously.

Anyway, Betsy getting married was a big deal to me.  I was excited for her and proud of her.  My biggest desire was to get her an awesome gift.

Problem. . . I had a sum total of ZERO money.  None.  I could ask my Dad for money to buy this awesome gift, but this just didn’t seem right.  He would have happily obliged, but still it didn’t seem right.  I wanted to get Betsy a gift that expressed a fraction of my love for her (and Bill. . . my equally awesome brother-in-law).  What to do, what to do??? Continue Reading…

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Of all the weddings. . . this one was the most special

June 24, 2012 — 10 Comments

(This post is part of my series “My thoughts on weddings. . . (a series)”.  For an overview of and to read the other articles in this series, please click here.)

Mom and Dad Wedding picture (3)

June 24, 1962. . . a most special wedding in Glennville, Georgia.

In this season of weddings, my mind is reflecting today upon a particular wedding of which I was not a direct part of, yet it directly affected me more than any other in history.

This particular wedding began at 4:30pm on a Sunday afternoon.  It was June 24, 1962.  Fifty years ago today.

The setting was the sleepy southern town of Glennville, Georgia.  I’m sure it was hot and humid.  Sunday services had been in session there at the First Baptist Church just a few short hours prior to this wedding.  I’m sure there was hustle and bustle in putting flowers out and readying the church for this different type of worship service.

I’m certain the bride was stunning.  She still is 50 years later.  She had come to Atlanta out of Stetson University to become a teacher, but ended up falling in love.  I understand there were quite a bit of nerves that June day, but that was too be expected for an occasion of this magnitude.  Her cousin was performing the ceremony.  Her father had passed away a few years earlier, while she was a freshman in college, so he was unable to give her away.  Her mother, Georgia Mae, was poised and gracious as always, I’m sure.

I’m certain the groom was handsome.  He still is 50 years later.  With his cropped crew cut and quick natured confidence, I’m sure he was a site to behold.   He was just a few years removed from Georgia Tech and at the beginning of his professional career.  He was probably smirking and joking much of the day, as he has always been prone to humor in situations like this.  I imagine he was in rare form this particular June Sunday afternoon.  His family had come in car loads from Atlanta and other destinations.  I’m sure they were taking in the Glennville, Georgia charm.

Fifty years ago today my parents, John Wyman Gunter and Sarah Katherine Seckinger, were married.  My Dad, no doubt, shifted his feet impatiently Continue Reading…

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Mom’s laugh and sacrificial heart

April 22, 2012 — 55 Comments
John Gunter with parents

Mom, Dad, and I at their surprise birthday last year

Today, my Mom (Kay Gunter) is on my mind.  If you don’t know her, that is too bad.  She has a laugh that is inexplicably delightful.  She laughs from her belly.  She laughs loud and boisterous, the kind of laugh you can hear from far away locations, like from Atlanta to Toledo.  She laughs in a way that makes everyone in the room happier for being there.

Additionally, my Mom is sweet and kind.  She visits EVERYONE in nursing homes, hospitals, dungeons, caves, sewers, and every other rough place people who are fortunate enough to know my Mom end up.  Seriously, my entire life has been filled with her serving people who are down, Continue Reading…

In Life
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